How to be at peace with yourself when you’re “old”

bFaced with unforeseen circumstances, we are going to grow old. Truth: We may have been at peace with ourselves in our senior years, but if we don’t upgrade, we’ll be in trouble. How to be at peace with yourself when you are “old”? Here goes…

“The Big 7-0” came calling recently. Okay, it wasn’t the first day of being “old.” but I admit that he emphasized the point.

So why write this now? I mean, I’ve been old for how long? 10 years? Obviously, turning 70 had a lot to do with it, but there is more.

Notice physical changes.

Although I’m sure they had been in the making for a while, the day came when I noticed physical changes, I wish I hadn’t noticed them.

Having already accepted a lighter amount of gray upstairs and a variety of aches and pains, what hit me on that memorable day was skin that didn’t have the elasticity it used to have. Oh.

Fun story: I had an appointment with my primary care doctor several months ago. After the exam, he asked me if I had any questions. Pinching the inside of my arm, I asked if it was normal that my skin was looser than before.

Cute, she gave me a choice “Duh!” He looked and asked me how old I was. I understand.

appeared grandmother Turin

Sure, the physical changes contributed to feeling old, but this is what confirmed it and inspired the article.

I enjoy watching music and movie reactions on YouTube. I was flipping through a bunch on my phone about a week ago and the 2008 movie came up. Greater Turin .

I had seen it before, but between Clint Eastwood and the inner voice telling me to do it, I went in.

Walt Kowalski

If you haven’t seen the film, in addition to producing and directing it, Eastwood played the role of Walt Kowalski, a retired auto worker and Korean War veteran.

The film begins with his wife’s funeral and scenes showing his children disengaged and his grandchildren spoiled.

Walt, who often called him crudely and cruelly as he saw it, didn’t seem to have much inner peace. So it was easy to understand why many people avoided it.

Despite this, Walt developed a deeply affectionate relationship with the teenage Hmong brothers who lived next door.

He tried to hide it, but his coughing, bloody sputum, and doctor’s appointment scene left the impression that Walt was seriously ill.

Then the phone call came to one of his sons with a lab report in front of him. It became clear that Walt was terminally ill. I think I’ve known that for some time.

Finally in peace

Walt may have dodged unforeseen circumstances during the war and throughout his adult life, but not this time.

Without his wife, away from his children and grandchildren. Walt didn’t have much meaning in his life – there wasn’t much to live for.

However, unbeknownst to him, meaning and purpose had been developing and coming to life in the form of love and care to and from his teenage neighbors.

As the movie comes to an end, Walt gave his life for them.

I connected with Walt

I connected with Walt Kowalski. So much so that, again, his story was the inspiration for writing this article.

You may also find my two main connection points significant.

Although it was not his intention, Walt found meaning in his life, which brought him inner peace. And what makes it extraordinary is that he probably had both when he was working and his wife was alive: he lost them and found them again.

The other important point of connection is Walt’s acceptance of his terminal illness: its unforeseen circumstances. In doing so, he also accepted the inevitability of death and made peace with it.

I learned a lot from Walt.

What’s the point?

People worry about all kinds of things that make them prepare to be “old” and be “old.”

I understand that fear, finances, where to live, health, family, wills, etc. are important. But without inner peace and meaning in life, what’s the point?

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Greater Turin Movie Poster: Copyright 2008 by Warner Bros. Pictures. Qualifies as fair use under United States copyright law.

After a decades-long battle with panic, generalized anxiety, mood swings and alcohol dependence; Bill finally found his life’s passion and work: lending a hand to those in the same boat. At age 49 he entered graduate school and earned his counseling credentials. And he continues his service through Chipur and other projects.