For me personally, I modeled a lot of my behavior after my mother and grandmother. Growing up I thought they were perfect. They did everything for everyone and never made anything about themselves. I chose to emulate the behaviors of the two people I felt safest around, not knowing until later in life how unappreciated, taken advantage of, and unhappy they both felt on a deep level. Looking back, much of my understanding of avoidance came from watching them overlook their own needs to continue their plight of being everything to others.
